September is NICU awareness month, and since today is the last day of September, I wanted to share our story with you.  I have to start out by saying that our NICU stay was very brief.  10 days, in fact.  I know there are many, many families out there whose babies stay in the NICU for weeks, if not months, and my heart goes out to all of them.  Although my babies were Earthside at 33 weeks and were both in the 4 pound range, they were pretty healthy.  Savannah came out and they evaluated her, swaddled her up, brought her over to me and let me give her a kiss, and then she was off to the NICU.  Immediately after Sullivan was out and evaluated, he was put on oxygen.  They brought him over to me so I could take a peek at him because they needed to keep his oxygen flowing and get him to the NICU as quickly as possible.  With that said, I had no idea what to expect when I was finally able to see them.  Some family members and Tyre were able to go to the NICU around 4 am after they were born (I know this because I look back at the pictures they took and can see the time stamp) but I wasn’t able to go see them until around 10 am that morning.  I think one of the funniest stories from this time is when Tyre and my family went to see the babies this first time.  He had his wrist bands on (I talk about these in the next paragraph), but I’m not sure if anyone told him why he needed them.  When he buzzed in and they asked how they could help him, he said, “I’m here to see my kids,” like a proud new dad.  Well, because of the whole security thing, that doesn’t get you in the doors to the NICU.  So after having a little confusion and some coaching on what they needed from him, he was able to give them the correct number and enter the NICU.

Tyre and I were given wristbands for each baby that had a corresponding number for each baby.  Savannah had a number, Sullivan had a number….. To get to the NICU, we had to go through two different sets of locked doors.  Upon arriving at the NICU, we had to give one of the numbers to get inside the unit.  At this point, I had seen pictures, but I had not yet seen my babies in their new home.  I walked into their room and saw two isolettes on each side of the room with fleece blankets on top of them.  Apparently the babies needed to be kept covered for a few days to mimic being on the inside.  Both babies were hooked up to iv’s and were connected to machines that monitored their heart rate, oxygen level, and a few other things.  I then noticed that Sullivan had another machine by him, which sounded like bubbles in an aquarium.  I learned this was the CPAP machine and was responsible for delivering oxygen to him through two little nose prongs.  I started calling the room the aquarium because his blanket was green and blue with frogs and lily pads on it, and the constant sound of the bubbles from the machine sounded like an aquarium.  The isolettes were regulating their body temperatures because preemies have a hard time doing that.  The nurses told me I could hold Savannah against my chest and do skin to skin with her, and I have to be honest – I was super excited to hold her, but so nervous and scared at the same time.  I’d never held a baby that small, especially one hooked up to machines with cords and iv’s.  Is it possible to break her?  Is she ok to come out of her isolette?  What if the machines starting alerting us that something was wrong?  I had all of these crazy thoughts going through my head, but luckily, the nurses were there and guided me through the whole process.  They didn’t want to bother Sullivan at this time because he was still needing a lot of help breathing and had fluid in his lungs, so they wanted to leave him alone in his isolette for a little bit.  When we came back down later that evening, I was allowed to hold him.  I finally felt complete after holding both of my babies.

If you ever spend anytime in the NICU, you will quickly learn that the nurses are your lifeline.  They are the ones responsible for your baby and are your point of communication as to what is going on.  Every morning when Tyre and I walked in, they gave us a full update as to what happened since our last visit complete with telling us how much they weighed, how much they ate via bottle and/or feeding tube, any A/B episodes they had, if they had a bath, their temperatures, etc.  We were also there when they made their rounds which was our time to talk to the doctors and ask any questions as well.  I have to say, our NICU experience wouldn’t have been what it was without these incredible doctors and nurses.  It seriously takes a VERY special kind of person to work with these tiny babies (and their parents.)

We made multiple trips to the NICU throughout the day.  The babies were on a 3 hour schedule, which started with a diaper change and taking their temperature, then followed by feeding them.  The nurses weighed every diaper to monitor their urine output.  Before some of the feedings, the nurses would perform a more thorough inspection – taking their blood pressure and checking their breathing with the stethoscope.  To take the blood pressure of a baby, the cuff is placed around the leg of the baby.  I commented on how tiny the cuff was, and the nurse kind of laughed and said, “Yeah, and this is a size 3 out of 4.  You should see the babies who need a size 1.”  I replied, “I can’t even imagine…..”

Throughout our stay, we learned a lot of things – like what the oxygen level should be in a baby, what their heart rate should be, what their temps should be, how to change a diaper in an isolette with your hands sticking in the two holes on the sides, and most importantly, how to stay calm.  At first, every time a machine would go off, we would freak out!  The nurses would calmly check on the babies, pick them up, usually do some sort of “burping” gesture if needed, and get the babies back on track.  Savannah thought she was going to be a trickster several times and hold her breath during feedings, so her machines went off a lot in the beginning.  The doctors and nurses said as long as she could self correct, it wouldn’t count against her.  You see, one of the requirements for bringing home the babies was that they couldn’t have any a or b episodes, otherwise known as apnea or brady episodes, for 48 hours.  An apnea episode is when a baby doesn’t breathe for 20 seconds, which is then sometimes followed by a brady, or bradycardia, which is when the heart rate drops.  One of the other requirements is they had to take full feedings via bottle for 24 hours.  It took Sullivan close to a week to start taking most of his bottle.  Whatever he didn’t finish was put into his feeding tube, even if it was as little as 5 mLs.  Because it took so much energy for the babies to feed, they were only allowed a 30 minute window to finish.  After that, it was determined that they were spending more energy trying to feed than what they were consuming.

Once I was discharged from the hospital, Tyre and I had to figure out our new routine.  Every morning, I would call in a little after 7 (after shift change and before the 8 am feeding,) to check on how they did overnight.  I’d try to handle any personal business (making doctor’s appointments, working on insurance stuff, HR stuff for work, etc.) and then shower and drive to the hospital for the 11:00 am feeding.  We usually got there around 10:00 to be there when they made rounds.  After the 11:00 feeding, I would pump, then we would go to the hospital cafeteria for lunch.  I ate a lot of turkey and grilled cheese sandwiches during that time.  Then, I would either rest in the twins’ room with them or we would kind of just hang out waiting for the next feeding.  We would head home between 3:30 and 4:00 to try to get the house ready for them to come home, handle any more personal business, and do any chores like washing clothes, etc.  We’d head back up to the hospital around 7:00 for the 8:00 feeding and then home after.  These were hard feedings because we were tired, it was getting dark, the room sounded like an aquarium, and it was always a little warm in their room.  When I say hard, I mean hard not to fall asleep!  Everyone told me the feeling of holding your baby was the best feeling in the world, but it’s also one of the most comforting feelings, which means hard not to fall asleep 🙂  We’d usually get home a little after 9, eat something real quick, change for bed, and wake up the next day to start all over again.

At some point during this time, they popped the tops on their isolettes.  This may not seem significant to you, but it was extremely significant.  It meant they were starting to regulate their body temperatures better, which is huge.  Then a day or two after that, we walked in to finally see our two babies laying side by side (in their own bassinets, of course.)  They had done such a good job of regulating their temps, they were out of the isolettes for good.  They were still swaddled with a layer or two of blankets and little hats on, but they were out.  This was so exciting for us!  We were finally able to see both babies at the same time.  Up until this point, they were across the room from each other in their own isolette.

Then, one Sunday morning (which also happened to be Tyre’s birthday,) we walked in and they told us that Savannah could go home on Tuesday, and Sullivan had a very high chance of going home as well!  He had been off of his CPAP machine for a few days, and they had taken out his feeding tube and as long as he took all of his feedings until then and had no episodes, he could come home with Savannah.  We needed to bring in their car seats the next time we came so they could administer the car seat test.  Talk about freaking out – when we went home that day, it was major panic time – setting up pack-n-plays, getting diapers ready, clothes, blankets, cameras and baby monitors, owlets, etc.  They both passed their car seat test and only had their hearing test left to do.  Up until this point, Savannah was ahead of Sullivan in everything by a day or two.  To our surprise, Sullivan passed his with flying colors on the first round, and Savannah had to be retested the next day.  Luckily, she passed the second time around.

On the day we were to bring them home, it was very emotional for me.  I was so happy and excited, but extremely scared and nervous at the same time.  We walked in that morning, and they were unplugged from all of their machines.  Up until this point, I associated our babies with beeping, cords, tubes, etc.  To walk into their room and have no sound, it kind of freaked me out a little.  They were laying next to each other, just as content as could be.  Tyre and I had signed up for infant CPR that morning, so after we took that class and walked back in the room, they said, “Ok, let’s start the discharge process!”  I was like, “Wait, what? Now?”  And then, after going through all of the process, they said, “You’re ready to go now – we like to carry them out for you.”  We started packing everything up, because we had moved in clothes, blankets, books, boppies, and all kinds of stuff.  I’d previously ordered a wreath to be hung on my hospital door, but since it came in on the day I was discharged, we hung it on the twins’ NICU room door.  I also ordered these super cute name cards to put in their bassinets and just loved how they looked, especially when they were put into their bassinets and out of their isolettes.  Little things like this made their room more comfortable and homey.

And before I knew it, we were walking out.  We got to the car, put them in, and I was a nervous wreck the whole way home.  Looking back and forth from one to the other to make sure they were still breathing.  They were so tiny at this point, I mean, Savannah came home weighing 4 pounds 4 ounces.  Luckily the car seats we put on our registry could handle 4 pounds and up, but apparently not all car seats do.  Most start at 5 pounds.

After we got home and took some pictures, we got them inside and it was time to feed, just like normal.  The first few days at home were somewhat chaotic, and actually, they still are, but we love our little babies more than anything in the world.  There is not a better feeling in the world than sitting on the couch and holding both of my babies at the same time.

And to finish this story, I’ll leave you with some of the realness from home – in the first 24 hours of being at home, I was peed on, pooped on, and had breast milk all over me.  We have a little nook outside of our bedroom that we have deemed the baby changing station, and hopefully whoever buys this house after us will never know how much pee, poop, spit up, breastmilk, etc. have been on the floor, walls, etc.  We had them sleeping in the Four Moms playards with the bassinets in the top, and then realized where we set them up in our bedroom (only place they would fit,) the air vent was directly blowing on them, so we closed the air vent.  So that was weeks of sleeping with our air vent closed in our bedroom, because these babies do NOT like being cold….at all.  So no air vent, in August and September, in Houston.  But, I’m guessing that won’t be the last time we have to sacrifice some sort of comfort for the benefit of these little babes.

I’m happy to report that they are 7 weeks old today, and both weigh over 7 pounds!  I can’t even believe it.  They are out of their preemie clothes and diapers, and in newborn size.  They are the little loves of our lives, and I can’t wait to watch them grow and learn and explore.  I’ll keep you updated with their progress, but until then, go enjoy your Sunday!

Cheers – MP